6/28/08

What I am thinking about today!

It seems that I have incredible meaningful thoughts that I would love to express on my blog...when I am driving in the car, or at work, or while shopping. Then when I come here to type, I don't remember the the utter "brilliance" that I wanted to share (ha ha), or what I am feeling at those moments. I really think that I need to get a tape recorder of some sort.

Lately a lot of my thoughts have been in reference to the changes that will be happening to the O'Brien family this year. No-- the changes do not involve having a baby...we are not ready for that yet! No, it involves the imminent move to...well that's just it, I don't know where, or when. Everything is up in the air.

I feel bad for Chris, because I know that he has a lot of pressure to not only find a job, but to find a job he loves, that not only pays well, but is in a place that the whole family will love. I have already decided that I will be taking a leave of absence from the place I work, at least until I find a place or a person I feel comfortable leaving my child with, so with that I have no problem! Then after that I don't know! I am trying to decide what I want to be when I grow up..more thoughts on that at a later date.

I am excited at the prospect of this move and the new adventure that awaits, but I am also saddened knowing that we will be leaving the family of friends we have made here. We have lived here for 10 years and we have made a lot of friends and memories and it will be hard to say goodbye. Hopefully wherever we move to we can come back and visit, and our friends will want to come visit us!

Well that is it for today, until next time!!!!

What happens in a year!

So much can change in a year. When Xander was born we had his hand and foot imprints done by a lovely woman at the hospital. Well, when his first birthday came, I contacted the same woman and she came to our house and made imprints again, this time on clay shaped like a one. She brought the finished product by today. Chris and I marveled how much he has grown in a year, just by looking at his foot and hand prints. They were at least double in size. In fact almost everything about the boy has doubled, or in some cases tripled, in size!

Xander was 7 lbs 13 oz and 20 3/4 inches when he was born. He now weighs 25 lbs 8.5 oz and is 31 and 1/2 inches tall. He had no teeth, now he has 12 teeth. He had peach fuzz for hair and now he is growing a fine mullet (we are thinking a trim may be in order). Thankfully the growing process will slow down a little over the next few years.

Xander is such a clown, and keeps us laughing all of the time. He is so close to walking, it is scary. He walks like a champ holding on to your fingers or his little hippo walk/ride on toy. He'll even stand up on his own in the middle of the floor, and just look at you beaming at what he can do. He has taken a few independent steps, but either gets scared, or just too excited and either lunges toward you or sits down!

Sometimes I want him to continue to crawl, as it keeps him more a "baby" and other times (especially when I am carrying him) I want him to walk. Oh the inner turmoil! To see him learn new things is so amazing, and to see the excitement in his eyes when he does it is even more amazing.

Xander your daddy and I love you so much and everyday with you is a wonderful gift that we cherish. We are amazed by you and you bring us such joy everyday!

6/18/08

Isn't it funny...

Isn't it funny how when you become a parent things you wouldn't have given a second thought to are suddenly in the forefront of your mind. Here are a couple of things that I have been thinking about today...

1. Am I making my son fat? Is he eating the right foods? I was never obese when I was a child, in fact looking at pictures I was fairly thin. However, I am technically obese now. Do I feel obese-no, do people think I am obese-no. When I was a child, my mom was a stay at home mom. We lived about 10 miles from the nearest "city" of considerable size. Eating out and "going to town" were luxuries we got to do every now and then, it was a special treat. We had our own garden and my mom canned and froze fresh vegetables for us to enjoy in the COLD Minnesota winters. We raised cows (and by we I mean my parents) and would have someone butcher them for us and our freezer would be full of fresh meat. Trips to the grocery store were for things like milk and cheese, pasta, rice, cereal, bread-staples we did not make at home. The only time we had candy was at holidays, and any sweets we had were usually baked by mom or grandma. In fact the only sweet cereal we ate was when my Grandma Burt would bring it over. Now once my youngest sister started school, my mom went to work, and things around the house changed. Not for the bad of course, my mom still made sure we had healthy choices and we still made family dinners.

I say that my "battle" with weight started as soon as I got my license and a car. I went to work, and started earning the freedom of a paycheck. It was during these "independent " times where my weight started to increase. It wasn't a big deal for me to go to McDonald's or Taco Johns to get some lunch with friends, or to sit at Frontier Cake and Steak Restaurant for hours doing homework and eating chili fries, and drinking coffee loaded with sugar. My hours spent playing outside and running around our huge yard ended too. Now I am not even close to my heaviest weight which I would say was at my wedding, but I still need to lose about 80lbs to be at a healthy weight. While this has always been at the back of my mind, it is ever more important now that I have a child. Not only to I want to get healthy so I am there for him as he is growing up, but also because I want to set a healthy example for him. Now, I am not saying that he cannot have a Snickers bar if he wants, but everything in moderation. My biggest challenge is not the diet, but the exercise. I can lose weight on a diet, and if I am serious about it, stick with it. I lost all my pregnancy weight and am in a size smaller than I was before I had Xander (don't applaud), but I am still not there. My first goal in the next year is to lose 50 lbs in a healthy weigh through diet and exercise. My second goal is to ensure that I am setting a healthy example for my son, and to ensure that he gets healthy nutritious meals.

2. "Going Green" I never made a conscious effort to think about my impact on the world in which we live, until Xander was born. Of course, it also helps that every where you look nowadays you see or here about "Ways to Go Green" or "Save money and buy Green". Now, I never littered and at my parents we recycled, and I donate a lot to Goodwill and such, but recently I have been looking at both my spending habits, and other aspects of my everyday life. Now my husband would agree when I say I spend too much money on "things". ( I think I have some kind of addiction to shopping, and I am trying to fix the problem!) "Things" encompasses a lot of stuff, both needs and wants. While my spending on wants has dramatically decreased, my spending on needs has dramatically increased. Most of it is what I think are needs for Xander, I know that he perfectly content with the stuff he has, and really doesn't care whether he has 10 shirts and shorts outfits or 5. All of this stuff I buy will eventually end up in a landfill, and I want to limit my contribution to that, as well as teach my son the importance of saving the earth. I want my children's children to have the same kind of earth I enjoyed as a child, with clean air and clean water! So along with my healthy eating goal, I am making a healthy life goal. I have been making a conscious effort to curtail spending, and I am making progress, but it's one step at a time, and one day at a time. I feel better getting that out of my head and onto print. It makes me more accountable to myself, and makes me feel like I can make a difference in the world.

Things to do today (and everyday)...

1. Turn off lights--use the sunlight when possible
2. Do not let water run unnecessarily
3. Eat fruits and/or vegetables at every meal
4. Drink filtered water, rather than bottled water
5. Turn the tv off and explore the outside
6. Sing a silly song
7. Love yourself

6/12/08

Xander opened a birthday present today made by my grandma (his great-grandma). It was a little lovey blanket. When Xander opened the package and I pulled out the blanket it made me long to see my family. It is hard living 2300+ miles from everyone. My grandma will be 85 years young this September, but unfortunately she is not doing well either physically or mentally. It is hard to comprehend, as we have been living away from our family (in Minnesota) for almost 10 years. I remember my grandma from my youth, when she was very active and always in the garden or baking something delicious. Grandpa is still as "sharp as tack" my mom says, but he is feeling his years too, and needs to have knee replacement surgery.

Thinking of Grandma B, got me thinking about my other Grandma & Grandpa who have been gone now for over 10 years. They would've really loved Xander, and it's sad that they did not get to meet him.

When we are younger, we often times take advantage of our family and the fact that they'll always be there, or that they are always around. Looking back now, I wish I had spent more time with my Grandparents. Grandma & Grandpa V, are gone forever and Grandma & Grandpa B aren't going to be around forever. I wish Xander had the opportunity to visit with his grandparents more often, and sometimes I feel guilty living so far from them. Hopefully once Chris gets a permanent job, we'll be able to travel more often.

Until then, we'll have to make do with phone calls, e-mails and photos! I am so thankful that we live in a world (albeit an expensive one--gas for $3.72!!) where we can reach someone in an instant, either through the phone or the Internet. And when I am missing my family all I have to do is look at some photos or give them a call, and we are instantly connected.

6/6/08

Happy Birthday Xander

Well I woke up this morning and it finally dawned on me, the whole reason I have been so sad about Xander turning one is that he is now no longer my "baby". He is my little boy. He'll be walking and talking and running before long, and my snugly little baby will be replaced by an independent, strong willed little boy who wants to explore and of course get into things he shouldn't! Oh I know that he'll still come to his mama for hugs and kisses (at least for a little while!) and he'll still sit on my lap to read a book, but the days of exploring and running free are coming sooner rather than later. Of course this "little boy" started emerging before today, but I chose to ignore those times. I cannot ignore them any longer!

Does this mean that I am ready for another baby, definitely not. I have just come accept that I am now ready to move on to the next step of Xander's journey into adult hood. I am ready to cheer on his accomplishments, and move past the "baby" stage. Does that mean I won't cry anymore today, probably not. Today is a momentous occasion not only do we (Chris and I) get to celebrate the arrival of the sweetest, baby boy at 7:39 p.m., but we also get to celebrate the fact that we have been successful as PARENTS!!!! He is thankfully, happy and healthy and we had a little something to do with that.

So Happy Birthday Xander--my sweet, handsome, adorable, charming, little boy! I love you so much and look forward to this journey we call life!

6/5/08

my first blog

Well I never thought I would be a blogger, but after reading my sister's blog, I thought she had a pretty good thing going, so I decided to start my own.

Tomorrow is Xander's fisrt birthday, and whenever I think about it I cry. It just doesn't seem like a year has passed. I remember is birth so vividly, and when I look at him I wonder where the time has gone. He is so close to walking and will totter along holding on to our fingers. He is quite the charmer and loves to laugh and smile.

It also makes me cry to know that none of mine or Chris' immediate family will be here to help us celebrate. However, we do have some good friends here whom I consider my extended family and they will be here. For those that can't be here I have asked that they write a letter or card to Xander to be opened on his 18th birthday!

As it is, I have planned what I hope will be a special birthday for Xander--though he won't remember it!! I am going to attempt to make a cake from my childhood, called Wacky Cake. We will also be having a light lunch. Tomorrow we will be taking a picture of Xander in a blue polo shirt, which I will continue to do on every birthday. It will be neat to see how he changes every year. I also have a lady coming to take his hand and foot imprints. She came to our room at the hospital, to take his imprints, so this will make a nice ending to his first year!

Xander will be waking up soon, and I need to get his lunch ready. Talk again soon!

Keesha